Watch your words !

‘I am’ and ‘I do’ are the shortest complete sentences in English language.

Men are always of few words, on the contrary to ladies. Therefore these shortest words are by far used very often by men in most situations. But these two sentences could land a man completely in different circumstances.For example, during a marriage.

Priest: “Are you still single?”

Man: “I am”. No consequences yet

Priest: “Are you ready to accept the bride as your wife ?”.

Man: “I do”.

Priest: No further question. Over to you ma’am.

Wife: I’ll take over.

 

 

 

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Happy meal

It was a cold night and I was waiting to feed a hungry Hulk growing inside my stomach. I found one of the restaurants in the vicinity and looked through the menu.  One of the familiar dishes caught my eye and I didn’t wait to place the order.

I was standing at the cash counter as I began placing the order.

Me: I want one Chinese schezwan chicken noodles and that’s it.

The restaurant guy: One Chinese Schezwan Chicken noodles.

Me: Yes.

The restaurant guy: Do you want a vegetarian or non-vegetarian noodle?

Me: !!!!! . . . What did u say?

(I forgave him right away because he gave me a Non-vegetarian chicken).

Peekaboo with the Past

If I could go back in time, I would re-visit my old school for making amendments. First of all, I would do anything in all my power and influences to stop my history teacher from teaching history classes. The reason is, he didn’t like history. And I didn’t like history because I didn’t like him. I’d rather choose Ridley Scott or may be Nicolas cage. Dont’ ask me why.

Nevertheless history was far appealing then in my school days, but to a certain extent; exams and grades. But now it makes me realize what kind of influence could it make. Its important that the legacy should be preserved and taught. It always leaves us with two options; we either learn mistakes from the past or try to imitate them for its grandeur and glory. And also the history is full of conspiracies. In fact half of the truth is engulfed into darkness, deliberately.

But sady, we are a bunch of people with no sense of history. Damn, the whole world is archived into the history books. Every reputation in the present has its own story and  every glory has its past. It helps relate to things and get the chain of events. How astonishing if history would have taken me back in time every time I visited it. I could have lived a thousand lives through history.

All the answers lie in the past, don’t they?

I’m trying to learn the lives of the revolutionary humans of the past. How did they do it? What were the circumstances? What was the situation then? Who all were involved? who actually gave a thought? The wars. The motive behind wars. The civilization and the inventions. The artistry and the conspiracy surrounding them. The Egyptian Pyramids; they are might. The English colonies; they didn’t spare any land; The Romans; their astonishing warfare. The Mughals; they orchestrated culinary masterpieces .

To cater to educate this in my world, I would build historical libraries as much as shopping malls. Seriously! I want people spend lavishly on their knowledge and intellect. People would flock to get into these malls after work. The malls would have libraries and research museums where people can stop by, look into things and learn. Others would pass by the windows. May be I would introduce season sale on ‘Harappa and Mohenjadaro’ researches. And every day of the mall would have a theme attributed to any event in the past and I cannot stop imagining on this.

Again, the past brought us so much and we still thrive on them all. We hold responsibility to understand these splendors of time. Although we are far far from the the midieval and old ages in all aspects, we are just a group of boastful redundancies, because we always build on top of already existing entities than rebuilding from scratch; reusability. Remember?

On this ground, all our recent innovations are just an enhancements, I reckon.

I would continue to think on this and write further. I’m dozing to travel back.

Nuptial blues

It’s like jumping off the cliff without a gear and speculating a safe landing, an unwarned risk.

People have done that already. Either by own will or as the ‘only’ option to do, and thus the courage. They do it without making the disclaimer*. So is the customary fall for ages, one after the other. It looks scary but not much left as options. We wade through all way to the cliff wearily but this is getting scarier as we set for the jump. All the counterparts gather one by one for the event, but the only likable option is to delay the risk by letting someone ahead, watch them fall, taking a sitter, until the turn strikes again. The time lapses. Those who already jumped scream from the ground looking at the congregation. Some cry aloud, some cheer happily. But everything looks greener from far, far distance. Yet, when the time comes, you fall. That’s the leap of faith for a skeptical stag.

*Do at your own risk.

Precision or Tautology

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In the agile world, the art of conversation must be an innate skill that needs distillation before it’s delivered. But it’s not hard as we think. Whether it’s at a dinner with family, official meeting, or over the phone, a great conversation starts when two or more people meet and discuss distinctively. Because, whenever I talk, I intend to squeeze my talk and deliver quickly, the same as I would expect from someone talking to me. At least, one hour of anybody’s day is spent on talking, and people talk willingly for hours, let alone talkative women. If talking could burn calories, most people would be fit and gyms wouldn’t exist.

To get into detail, the very basic question that struck me was “why do we converse?”. Usually, we speak to exchange ideas or persuade or gossip indistinctly. And when we speak, our brain receptors converts the speech into visualization, in order to make better understanding. The optimal conversation, I think, is where these visuals match identically.

As a student, I always felt lectures to be boring while short talks kept me curious and listening. This is because the brain could endure listening only for relatively short period. Therefore, in order to converse efficiently, the talks should be short enough to lie within the listening interval and long enough to convey ideas vividly.

Further, in business meetings, talking corresponds to monetary figures. In either possible or impossible negotiations, talking prolongs to make sure business doesn’t go off hand. To these businessmen, the trade is successful when a deal gets a nod. There was a time where the sales team had to pitch in for extra innings in an effort to sell their products. But nowadays the trend is getting to the point.

To continue, Women and talking go hand in hand as they talk endlessly. A reserved woman is a myth. Even to the simplest of things, women talk in detail or repetition. In my personal experience within household, my grandmother keeps repeating things or tasks every six months to get it done from me. I agree that I take few months of procrastination unless urged quickly and God willingly, the task gets started though the ending is ‘X’.

Is it a mark of skillful mind to be able to convey ideas in precision? Indeed, it is, far from shadow of doubt. The finest of people I’ve met talk in counted, meaningful words and always kept me interested in their talking. That’s how they become sensible in my eyes and classified inside my head.

Beyond recall, I wondered how the leaders clout the massive crowd with flattering words? I, at times, go ‘Wow’ when some people talk and feel like asking for more. On the other hand, loquacious leaders are impotent to rule over their clan. Be it a manager, coach or a superior or a captain, people follow the leaders whose talk is compliant with smartness.

Remember Michael Corleone in The Godfather? The character is nothing short of charm and brilliance. The discussion with The Senator, Pat Geary, regarding a business settlement is absolute precision and one of my many favorite quotes of the classic saga.

“I want your answer and the money by noon tomorrow”

“Senator, you can have my answer now if you like”.

(Senator Nods).

“My offer is this, Nothing“.

That’s finishing in style. I’m not talking about just using shorter sentences and ending talks, but being witty as well.

When we talk less, every word weighs more and people who talk few words of sense gain respect. How to talk precisely? I think these things might help. Here you go !

Speak reliably: If you intend to keep things right, honesty is the best policy. This would solve a lot of problem.

  • “Say what is true, although it may be bitter and displeasing to people”. – Prophet Muhammad  

Listening: I feel listening is a way of showing respect to someone you talk. If you talk, you talk. If someone talks, you listen. That’s the thumb rule. Listening is important and gives the time to think and reply short.

  • Wait until the person finish and look out for a reply.
  • Also the difficulty lies in impatient speaker who intrudes very often. In any way, keeping calm and listening will help a little.

Rehearsal helps: Most often, the scope of discussion in any meeting is known. It’s wise to know what the agenda is and be perceptive of what is expected.

  • Observation from the last meeting would help this happen.
  • Most prediction of results are from the patterns from the past. This really help expect things and be ready.

To say ‘NO’: Denial is the unused lifeline in most of the situations. When we speculate on giving something, the trust factor is put to risk. If the promise is not kept, then future relationship is at peril. Indeed, No is the most difficult word to be used, but it’s a valuable aid. If it’s a ‘No’ then it has to be a ‘No’.

  • “I understand the situation is critical but with all the other factors and considering the effort, it is not possible at the moment”.
  • “For this, my answer is going to be ‘No’ and I am going to explain why”.
  • “I can’t do this for you, because I’m held up with something really urgent”.

Take time and ensure clarity: Talk in clear, loud and slow manner with clear intention. Elder people talk slowly and with infinitesimal use of words. Careful usage of words will not hurt anyone.

  • “If I may ask you, Is this what you said?.”
  • “In that case I need some more time until I get back to you with the necessary information. Is this Okay for you?”
  • “The situation is critical and I will not be available until a week. Do you have any concerns?”.

KISS: ‘KISS’ whenever you speak for productive listening from the person you’re talking to. In my reference, KISS deciphers to ‘Keep it short and sensible‘.

  • “Alright let’s summarize our discussion for a clear understanding and call the meeting off”.
  • “Okay I understand this but let me talk to you soon”.

Nevertheless, the speaking cults are volatile and completely ridiculous. Uprooting is far from possible. Refine your talks and be Precise. My belief is precision and clear-cut talking could make one look smart. Thus the quote.

“Men of few words are the best men.”

― William ShakespeareHenry V  

Picture Courtesy: Google

The Secret to Learning a Foreign Language as an Adult

TIME

Answer by David Bailey, CEO of Spotnight, on Quora.

I’ve learned several foreign languages as an adult. I was able to learn French to conversation fluency in 17 days using the following techniques. Note that I had previously learned Spanish to fluency so this was not my first foreign language.

In summer of 2005 I stayed with a French friend in a tiny village in the Beaujolais region of France. No one in the village spoke English and, since my friend knew I had an ambitious learning goal, she refused to speak to me in English as well.

I set up a routine where I did the same things every day.

In the mornings, I woke up and wrote out longhand the regular and irregular verb tables for 1.5-2 hours. I managed to get through an entire pad of paper in two weeks. I still believe that writing…

View original post 417 more words

‘Green’ is good but ‘The Reds’ are very essential

Pedestrian_LED_Traffic_Light_NYC Freeeeze! It’s red!

Ever since the inception of road commutation, the traffic laws are set up for maintaining order. Be it in a fresh blissful morning or after a weary evening at work or while on an exhilarating trip, we all go through the traffic signals on road. The red, yellow and green. These signals are the commanders of the vehicle movement facilitating harmony and safety.

We have to follow the rules on road. The instructions are clear. Wait and move. The roads always witness scenes of cars and trucks stalled one behind the other and moving in an order. Their brakes are on, sparkling ‘reds’ at the rear, cautioning us. And then glitters the ‘green’ for free movement!

What’s the big deal in it? There is, if you think of road accidents. People panicking on their vehicles and traffic creates frustrations and gets on nerves, doesn’t it?

On the contrary, Can we imagine road junctions without these traffic signals? Without the ‘red’ signal. Can it be anything but red? Green all time? I don’t think so. In that case, all I could imagine is fatal disasters.

We have a very similar set up in our daily lives. We all experience the traffic of opinions. People! People are full of opinions.

Somerset Maugham quotes as, “People ask you for criticism, but they only want praise.”

What do we infer?  Opinions ! We need opinions of people. Be it a concert, a football game, a presentation, we ask for evaluations and feedback. Actually we seek praise and appreciation. All we need is green-esque praises, but reds are inevitable. Aren’t they?

People around us are going to review and assess our actions ! Some express verbally, some show signs by actions, some share it publicly, some spread across people and some who just think. But everyone has opinions! I’m taking a metaphorical comparison of these opinions to the traffic signal.

There are three kinds (or rather colors) of opinions: I have given colors for the opinions of people.

  • Green: Green opinions are those that uplift us with its positivism. These are the things that we desire to hear from people. Appraises! Aren’t we envious to read an appreciation mail at work, or a reward or a positive feedback? One sentence could make a difference, “You did great” and these words reverberate and strike the happy cord and tug our heart for smiles. These are green !
  • Amber: Yellows are words that create a balance. They show signs of criticism but it’s a tricky maneuver. It’s a blend of anode-and-cathode of views. It doesn’t really create an impact ! Simply neutral.
  • The Reds: Reds are critics. Reds ask us to stop and requires change. They are words seeking improvement, words that disrupt the pace of our performance. Complications !

I always felt difficulties in digesting any critical opinion. Our Parents are best critics. They know us better than we do, don’t they? Their critical voices mostly hit us hard, crimson-red. But if we ponder, those are for the betterment. The red-words are to be listened carefully.

Having said that, how do we tackle critics? Here is what I could think of critical reactions.

  1. Listen: Open up, embrace and listen to the improvements or criticisms and note down the views of the critic. It’s important to record the words as it is said.
  2. Ponder: Ask these questions: Is it true? Does it make sense? Can it be considered to work on? Will it make any better? If yes, move on to act. Ignore if not.
  3. React: Act and prove it wrong.

I have Malcolm’s quote supporting my perception.

“If you have no critics you’ll likely have no success.” – Malcolm X

I strongly believe that “praises may be fake, but the critics will always have some portion of truth to it“.

In case of Criticism: Take it, ponder and prove them wrong, bang on! That’s how we succeed.

P.S.Your opinions on this article are welcome.